FRIDAY

It was Good Friday.
A Day of solemnity.
A day for fasting and abstinence.
Christ died for us,
to save us all from sins.
Because of him, I am where i am today.
I thank God for my life.
Indeed, I'm forever grateful.

The day started with me waking up early
to go for the Good Friday service at
Church of The Holy Trinity.
We had veneration there as well.
I love going to church.
Always, without fail.
I feel so safe and secure with the Lord.

Went for lunch afterwhich I was suppose
to go to work and finish up some stuffs,
but Maureen and I decided to not go back
in the end, coz bank rules state that no unsolicited
calls shoulbe made to customers on Sundays and
Public Holidays.

Haha.
Ended up slacking at home.
That's so unlike me to do that on Fridays.
But since it was Good Friday, I compromise. =)

Later in the evening,
my parents and I headed for St Joseph's Church
for another major veneration,
it was the norm every year to go there.
For prayer and all,
we ate at the NUTC Foodfare at Bedok.
Such gluttons, we ate Assam Fish Head,
Omelette and Mix Vegetables Broth.
Gosh, we were ALL PIGS. Lol.

We had to queue before getting into the church.
People from all walks of life,
come for this significant event.
It took at least 2 hours before everything was over.

Bought a drink from Macs
and headed home.
Was so freaking tired.
LOL.
Slept late as usual, just can't sleep.
Obviously, there was only one reason to it.
HIM.
Beats me.

End of Good Friday.

- I love my religion,
- I believed in miracles,
- but that didn't happen.
- Miracles aren't for sinners like me.
- You tell me where you're going and all,
- I feel we're still together.
- I try my best to love you silently,
- but each time like a thief,
- you steal bits and pieces of my shattered heart,
- leaving me with an empty soul.

* Tell me, is this all just a game to you?


SATURDAY

Holy Saturday today peeps.
I had time to sleep.
But I had to go to work.
I woke up at 10plus am,
but being the usual pig that I was,
I wne tback to sleep again, thinking
that it was still early when I was suppose to
meet Maureen and Dexter for lunch at 12p.m. LOL.

Raven woke up late and my sis was already prepared,
therefore she had nowhere to go.
So I delayed my time and accompanied my sister for awhile.
I reached the office like 1.30p.m.
Lol.
Bought lunch for Jane, poor her, she was hungry.
Maureen was starving, I apologised. Lol.
Sorry babe.

Before I could even start work,
I went to get lunch with Maureen and Dexter.
Packed food back and we ate at the pantry.
One of our casual spot.
We talked, crapped, laughed our ass off
and bitched about anyone possible.
I only started working at aorund 3p.m

Only manage to sell a card.
It was good enough.
Then I was slacking all the way.
Eating and disturbing everyone possible.

Stupid Maureen had to give DD my blog address,
peng san.
not that I didn't want my blog to be seen,
but DD doesn't know that I'm lesbian,
but oh well, since he read already.
He knows.
DD, you better zip your mouth about
my gender preference or I'll rip your balls
out! I meant what I say dude. =)

J asked me if i wanted to accompany
him to get his tattoo done,
I was reluctant at first,
coz there's so much story behind the tattoo.
But I eventually said yes.
Crazy I know, can't help it.
I love him.

Met him at Far East Plaza,
asked about the price of his tattoo and all,
he asked for my opinions and all.
I felt really important at that point of time.
Like I still meant something to him.
But as we talked at all,
the conversations that followed were harsh and all.
He adored that tattoo design like his life.
He even had that paper laminated.
Gee. Don't have to do that to that extent right?
Oh well.
Was supposed to go sing and all,
but we just ended up walking around town.
On the way to borders,
I saw Jasmine with joe and Jean
and J said Jamsine looked like her.

I don't wanna comment,
ended up sitting at Starbucks and talked.
We tlaked about everything else except us.
Maureen and her ex Wen Hu joined us.
Oh well, what's with the ex issues?

I realised J was different.
They got some booze form 7-eleven,
they drank, talked about some shit.
J was giving out great hints.
I knew at that very moment,
everything's gone.
His feelings towards me,
his love,
his care and concern.
All came to a stop.
Period.

It's really finally over and done with.
Can't help it.
Heart piercing,
chest hurting,
but like the usual me,
I hide this emotional wreckage
and became a downright idiot for love.

Couldn't take it no more,
when j messaged and said,
" I'll be happier if we can be friends "
You know what?
Let it be done.
I've had enough of this spinning shit.

I called husband up,
he was being the usual sweetie.
Being there for me and all.
We talked, seriously.
For a whole 1 and a half hours.
Conclusion was:
Love is crap.
Love is shit.
No use believing it no more.
Lust is our priority now.
We're going to get all the girls, guys and butches
around Singapore.
Have a fling with no strings attached.
I' not saying this in a fit of anger.
I'm serious.

The red ones and white one have already
got the ball rolling,
Jer, Cathy, Cow, Bea,
join us in this big extravaganza.

Be the people that we are supposed to be.
No more pain people.
We have to get a life!

- You know,
- I love you
- and i can't bring myself to hate you.
- But what is done cannot be undone.
- You want me to move on?
- Great, don't choke on your words next time.
- coz I'm going to have as much fun as I want.
- Be it if I'm alive or dead,
- it's none of your freaking business.

* The Jacinta you knew no longer exists.