I wished I had things my way sometimes.

Today, work has been alrite.
Things have been fine.

Got to know more people,
social life has expanded.
Friends are everywhere.

But somehow,
the aspects of my life that are not fulfilled
are my family and my love relationships.

Parents don't know I am depressed
coz of my break-up with him.
They yell, scream, shout
like I owe them a living.

Who cares? Will he?
I don't bother.
I don't give a damn.

He doesn't know my pain of wanting to be with him.
He wanted to eat smelly toufu with me,
and I thought to myself.
Why only now do you choose to do all these?
Do you think it'll ever mend the
promising hope of me wanting to eat that with you
as a couple and not friends?
It's broken,
it's not the same anymore.

I don't wanna think about all these stuffs.
It's giving me a headache.

- You know something?
- I wanna whisper to your ears,
- now listen,
- you only hear my inconsistent breathing.
- I'm getting nearer to death.

* I've stopped hoping and dreaming a long time ago.