this entire week
hasn't been a great one.

days seem to pass so slowly,
it feels so dead.
the line of excitement
is never found.
the monotonous routine
of my life,
is just simply pathetic.

my parents are just weird,
or should i say bias.
according to how i feel,
they love me alot less now
than before.
before they knew everything.
before they knew i wasn't on the right paths,
before i became a lesbian.
i can sense the vast difference,
but should i voice out?

i guess i'm just too tired of such attitudes.
it feels rather contradicting.
it doesn't matter anymore.
i'm numb to such feelings.

it's okay if i'm treated differently,
at the end of the day,
i'm still the JA that everyone knows.

- not seeing you for days,
- it's been hell for me,
- wish i could be like others,
- always being with you,
- never apart.
- did i tell you i loved you today?
- i do. always. =)

* i'll meet you at the stairway to heaven.